I guess what I am trying to say is that when you are younger you think that at some stage you'll have it all worked out. Well - you never do. The game keeps shifting.
One thing that becomes apparent is that life is hard. It's a constant struggle. It's demanding. Things need to be attended to. There is no escape. There is no easy way out.
Life never becomes what we imagined it would become. It becomes something very different. It becomes that same thing that it always was, and always has been: a challenge.
Each of us, struggling to work things out, get it together, get to a place where we can relax and enjoy. But this is impossible. The nature of existence is that you constantly get bombarded with difficulties to overcome.
Like the turtle in the picture above, we are going nowhere. If we are lucky we might make it to water. But even then we must evade predators, find food, keep moving.
Like T, most of us develop hard exteriors and as often as we can, retreat inside ourselves - grateful to escape the demands of the day, the surroundings, the activities. Over the years we have somehow constructed and nurtured a complex and hopefully comfortable relationship with our inner selves. We've devised a silent sanctuary to which we can retreat.
Nobody likes being hassled, stressed, to have demands put upon them. We just want to be left alone. We just want to breathe easy for a while. To not have to attend to the never ending demands.
We are souls trapped inside the bodies manifest of human beings. And it is hard work. Do we not, all of us, wish life was... different? Why isn't it the way we all wish it could be? Why have we chosen, on some deeper level, to attend this form of existence? Is it really worth it? Why are there not other options? Mankind seems to be taking far, far too long to evolve. Where's the bliss? How far to heaven on earth? We are tired of being turtles stuck on a bird bath.
Is anyone listening? Anyone who can do anything about it?
Of course not. Feels good to have had a whinge. A lament. A sigh put into words. At least we have this - we can share our feelings and thoughts with fellow sufferers. We can unite in our misery. Come together in hardship. Perhaps it is our salvation. Perhaps it is the point. To join together.
All is know is - in the end you die. And the end comes to quickly. Sure life is pain and heart ache - but why does it have to end so soon?